Photo by Yan Berthemy on Unsplash

Last night I had two dreams. One of deep joy and the other, frustrating. In the first I was in a home and suddenly I became aware of the fact that I was dreaming. Wow … I can create whatever I please now, I thought. As I looked at one of the bedroom doors, I wondered if perhaps, when I knocked, my dad who passed on last October, would answer. I knocked. His voice responded with such clarity and I entered the room. Every details was vivid. Every expression authentic; his dry wit in tact. I was overjoyed as other family members joined in conversation. Nothing profound was said, no message from heaven – just simple conversation and being together and that was absolute bliss for me.

Then I became aware of another person in the room whom I did not recognize at first. Again I became aware of the fact that I was dreaming and I decided to transform this person into an acquaintance from years ago with whom I needed to complete a conversation. But the face would not transform and I could not control the dream. The dream became more and more frustrating. It seems to me that one cannot consciously manipulate the unconscious to produce quick fixes. 

Both Mary-Anne and I awoke early in the morning and we discussed our dreams. It seems to me that my relationship with my dad has been concluded (as far as this earthly existence) and the wholeness in which it was concluded is preserved. I’ve only had three dreams of him and every time I did, I was simply at peace and overjoyed to be with him. Nothing more had to be said … the reality of who he was/is, was enough. In a way the relationship no longer needed to develop, as all relationships on this earth need to, rather, the relationship that was, was sufficient and brought into the present. I don’t know if I can communicate this intelligently, but I’m trying. Maybe what we think of as eternity is not a continuation of relationship as we know it now, but rather, that we are eternally present to God and one another in a wholeness that no longer changes…then again, this might just be a precious experience, and I’m yet to be surprised by what is to come.

As far as I remember it was in Jurgen Moltmann’s book, The Coming of God, in which he explored different ways of understanding the end, including the end of our personal lives. It was in one of the perspectives he discussed that the words ‘eternally present to God’ was used. I found it intriguing, yet had reservations because it seemed to imply that individual consciousnesses do not continue, but rather, that all will be present to God – each person will be preserved in the consciousness of God.

The experience I had in this dream, however, opened up a new insight to me. Maybe the individual and collective consciousness of humanity is in fact part of God’s consciousness. In that sense, to be eternally present to one another, is to be eternally present to God as well. Isn’t that what the resurrection hope is all about – that every relationship that ever was, will be brought into the beauty and completion it was intended for, and given a bodily presence. For every relationship is in reality connected to all relationships. Either all will be reconciled (Col 1:20) and God will be all in all (1 Cor 15:28) or none will. 

For more thoughts on the unconscious see our Youtube playlist, Secrets of Silence

19 Responses to “Dreaming of loved ones who passed away”

  1. gloria bauernfeind on

    When my daughter had breast cancer and going through chemo, i was a wreck!! Driving her to all appointments and praying she would be ok. At one point i had what i call a visitirs dream. I think God knew i needed this. I was in a bed and my aunt who had passed away came and led me to her den where i grew up. My whole family that had all passed was there, mother, dad, aunts, except my grandma. But my dad fixed eyes on me.. they were all smiling and talking with each other. But he put his arms out and i got a literally heavenly hug. I knew my daughter would live and i had peace. I woke up and cried from joy and to this day (5years ago) i feel his arms around me. I will never forget that dream. God is amazing, he knew what i needed. No words spoken just love and peace. ♥️♥️♥️

  2. PAUL ERWIN on

    Isn’t that what you are teaching in meditation and silence retreats?
    To be present to our deepest self and our relationship to ourself,
    Is to be present to God? We are the God essence, substance.
    We need to become aware of this through our spiritual practices.
    We don’t have to seek him outside, he is within, especially our dreams.
    We can not control our unconscious, our dreams, or our destined lives.
    Good thing.
    Divinity is the substance we experience in all relationships.

  3. Al Carden on

    Becoming aware that I was not made by God but rather I was made of God seems to have re-ordered my physical and spiritual steps. It has caused me to experience a continuous heavenly embrace that not only assures me of who I am but also whose I am. I am because He, Christ Jesus is.

    One year after my father’s death, I had a dream where he came walking up into the front yard of the house in which I grew up. He no longer looked like the 92 year old man that passed from his physical life on earth, but rather he looked like the young man portrayed in some of the old photographs that I had seen growing up. I shall never forget the sense of peace that accompanied that dream. I witnessed my dad walking up to our old home place. He was dressed casually with his short sleeves rolled up and he carried a small tackle box and a fly rod. He was very unassuming. What was communicated in that simple encounter is that he was doing just fine enjoying the things he loved. In an instant an overwhelming sense of love came over me that my Heavenly Father thought it was necessary to allow my earthly dad to communicate to me that he was just fine. What a Gift!

    • Andre Rabe on

      “not made by God but rather I was made of God” – wow Al. These kind of dreams do carry a sense of peace that surpasses understanding. It’s a glimpse into the reality from which we came, which sustains us, and draws us into its future.

  4. Thomas Sixberry on

    I haven’t dealt this way with any of my loved ones yet but I have pondered what it may be like when they past on. I imagine them repeating Paul’s words, “I’ve ran my race.” and leaving me with renewed confidence.

  5. Truda Pretorius Keyser on

    Do not start with dreams Andre … I will not be able to stop! Had such amazing experiences individually and communally. God surely speaks into our unconscious if we are able to listen and discern. Most important is the platform of peace from where we open to Godly experiences/ consciousness / impart-ation. anxiety and unease opens to anxiety and un-peace in our unconscious minds and experiencesas well. Such a rich field of interest! Bottomless! Blessings!

  6. susan scalisi on

    my dear father passed a year ago march and my mom 44 days later. such a time that was. while i was on the other side of the country for my mother’s passing, though she had been ready to go for years, i was fortunate to spend dad’s last week or so with him. as he slowly, and not always enjoyably, left this plane. for another. my dad wasn’t a ‘believer’, and didn’t even expect anything, let alone anything good, to happen for anyone after death. though i know, deep inside, that he hoped. but those last days with him… i saw a man, who had been frustrated, frequently angry, dissatisfied, and often unnerving to those around him, transform into a spirit who glistened like the sun… with radiance streaming from his eyes… of love. of LOVE. pure. and childlike. and it’s like that’s all that was left… in the end… and all that ever really existed… love. and before he was unable to speak any longer, we spoke of those who he dearly loved who had passed before and who, however these things work, ‘all of a sudden’, it seemed, he now KNEW he would see again. and soon. very soon. and that it would be ~glorious~. which filled him with joy. and happiness. and there was so much peace. mmm… i’m smiling. and at one point even, during this between here and there time, in the dusk of one quiet hospital evening, he sang along with me, on his back in bed, my strong sturdy capable father, his weakening arms swaying midair like a drunken holy ghost conductor, and our lips sounding god’s love and praises. (woah, i’m getting all teary remembering that). but such a time that was. such a time. such a god. so thankful i was there. thank you, jesus. thank you, jesus!

  7. Lore Nielsen on

    Reposting this from Facebook: Your dream about your father describes a similar experience to mine. The night after my father died 2 years ago, I was sleeping in at my parent’s house in a room with a large wicker chair by the foot of my bed. In the dream, I woke up and my father was sitting in the chair. I called out “Papa” to him (which is what I called him and what has also made it difficult for me to call God Papa). He seemed to point toward the bedroom door and said, “There’s your Papa.” I looked toward the door and there was no one there. Then I realized he was pointing in the air and again he said, “There’s your Papa” as he made a sign of the cross in the air. I realized two things. First, he was with our Papa and now fully knew the Love demonstrated on that cross. Second, he was releasing himself and me from the relationship we had while he was alive. We were now brother and sister and God is our Papa. It was a beautiful release into Love.

  8. Louise Lockridge on

    I had two healing dreams after my mom died with cancer. To set the stage, my mom had difficulty with relationships. She had difficulty connecting even with my sister and me. Long story short, my sister and dad passed away within a month of each other and my mom lost her battle to cancer a year and a half later. I took care of my mom physically while she was dying but we had no real emotional connection. My mom made it very clear that she didn’t really want to hear what I had to say so I helped her quietly as she died. After my mom’s death, my first dream took place in the house I grew up in. In this dream, my mom was nurturing and comforting to me in a way she was never able to be before. In the second dream, I was in my house on my couch, somewhere between awake and asleep, when my mom came in the room. She was beautiful, glowing, looking better than I had ever seen her. I heard her speak to me and told her how good it was to hear her voice and complemented her beauty. After that, I woke up. Ever since, I have had peace knowing she is healed from the issues that caused her problems. Our relationship was healed through that experience, too.

    • Andre Rabe on

      What a beautiful vision of healing … it seems to me that the thought in Philippians that every knee shall bow and every tongue confess is just such a promise of healing when we come face to face with the truth.

  9. Robert on

    i love reading the experience in lives that bring forth events that unfold the realitys of peace and contentment, i to lost a father years ago wanting to share a dream but never did until some years later visiting a home in my dream both my parents greeted me at the door i was so shocked to see them walking in i thought we would discuss old times but fare from that they both were just radiating a contentment and a peace that i cant begin to describe, i woke with a unbelievable joy and a mind at rest, what a feeling of utter contentment


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